Horatio Caine: Alright, be on the lookout for an Eastern European male with bad teeth who may have access to an ape.

Horatio Caine: You know what they say "You lie down with the Devil, you wake up in Hell".

Horatio Caine: We are being detoured into the land of make-believe.

[death by carbon monoxide]
Man: What killed that guy?
Tim Speedle: He had gas.

Horatio Caine: The only thing that matters is the evidence.

Horatio Caine: When you have everything, sometimes it feels like nothing.

Horatio Caine: The problem with manipulation is that people can turn on you.

[describing a victim]
Horatio Caine: Jeans, T-shirt... K-Mart socks.
Det. Frank Tripp: Big spender.

[defending a woman from a suspect]
Horatio Caine: The next time you want to take a swing at someone, start with me.

Alexx Woods: Unreasonable acts are all I see.
Horatio Caine: Amen to that.

Tim Speedle: She looked him right in the eyes when he was killing her.
Horatio Caine: And he looked back.

[to Eric]
Horatio Caine: If we want to be effective on this job we have to survive, too.

[victim is lying dead on the floor, with a knife in his head]
Ryan Wolfe: Knife missing from this block could be our murder weapon.
Alexx Woods: [sarcastically] Nice work, Ryan. Think you may have cracked the case.
Ryan Wolfe: Thanks. I have a keen grasp of the obvious.

Calleigh Duquesne: [walks into gun vault, smiles and sighs] I love my job.

[finding incriminating evidence at a crime scene]
Horatio Caine: The killer just made his second mistake.
Yelena Salas: What was his first?
Horatio Caine: Murder.

Calleigh Duquesne: Run and shoot Ryan, our crime scene is going under.

Detective John Hagen: Where have you been?
Calleigh Duquesne: I took a drive.. got some fresh air... I apprehended an escaped felon.

Detective John Hagen: Where have you been?
Calleigh Duquesne: I took a drive, got some fresh air... apprehended an escaped felon.

[at a car accident scene]
Eric Delko: Do you think they were killed in the crash?
Alexx Woods: Not unless they each crashed into a bullet.

Stewart Otis: [about his victim] I never even got to play with her.
Horatio Caine: [pause] Life, Stewart, is filled with disappointment.

[Horatio & Bernstein look at the crowd]
Detective Bernstein: 50 witnesses.
Horatio Caine: 50 suspects.

Brad Repkin: I have rights!
Horatio Caine: You violated your rights so shut up!

Megan Donner: It looks like scars, dozens and dozens of scars.
Eric Delko: It looks like he fell into a blender!

Eric Delko: Engines on that baby cost more than your car.
Tim Speedle: Maybe your car.

Rita Davis: Can I go now?
Horatio Caine: Let me see, how can I put this... no.

[about medical procedure]
Alexx Woods: When the IV fails, they have to give it directly to the heart. You know, Uma Thurman, Pulp Fiction.

Ryan Wolfe: [about the tsunami heading for Miami] This is gonna be a monster.

Lieutenant Horatio Caine: [about Yelaina Salis] Touch her again and I will kill you.

Catherine Willows: Ready, honey?
Lieutenant Horatio Caine: Coming dear.

Honey Girl: Some guys like to lick it off.
Lieutenant Horatio Caine: I prefer the swab myself.

Tim Speedle: Only way to outrun an alligator is swim faster than the guy next to you. Right Delko?
Eric Delko: I used to have a partner.
Lieutenant Horatio Caine: Guys, please.

Special Agent Dennis Sackheim: What did she say?
Lieutenant Horatio Caine: That you need to learn the language.

Paul Tomassi: Do you have any idea how much one of those costs?
Lieutenant Horatio Caine: About half as much as two.

Tim Speedle: I love hotel rooms - body fluids everywhere.

Calleigh Duquesne: Only tool marks will tell.

Calleigh Duquesne: What woman wears panty hose in Miami?

Patrick Wilder: Lesser artists borrow. The great ones steal.

Calleigh Duquesne: Wow, I think I should dump Tox and get into DNA.

Horatio Caine: Here we go.

[first lines]
[Horatio & Eric arrive upon the scene of an airplane crash]
Eric Delko: [to phone] Flight 906, outbound Miami to D.C. Dropped off the radar at 0820, crashed right after takeoff.
Lieutenant Horatio Caine: How many on board?
Eric Delko: [to Horatio] NTSB confirms 2 pilots, 6 passengers - total of 8 souls.
Lieutenant Horatio Caine: 8 souls unaccounted for, OK.

Eric Delko: Leave it to you, Calleigh, to find something good to come out of a hurricane.
Calleigh Duquesne: They do alleviate global warming.

Drake Hamilton: You said our DNA was contained in a single cell. How do we get around it?
Horatio Caine: Your family? You stop procreating.

Lieutenant Horatio Caine: [after a colleague cuts the circuitry of a bomb] Circuit interruptus.

Ryan Wolfe: You always take his side.
Calleigh Duquesne: Funny. He says the same thing about you.

Eric Delko: I never made it to the original crime scene; did you?
Lieutenant Horatio Caine: Five hours ago.

Calleigh Duquesne: Everything old is new again.

Horatio Caine: Drive-by, Miami style.

Detective Frank Tripp: Dispatch, we gotta code 18.
Dispatcher: Hit and run, any victims?
Detective Frank Tripp: Victims, yeah me!

Don: Your grandmother better be bleeding from her eyeballs.

[about Alexx]
Horatio Caine: Fastest scalpel in the East.

Horatio Caine: You leave that to me.

Tim Speedle: This is the place you go when the doorman turns you down everywhere else.
Eric Delko: Oh, so you hang out here too!